The one thing we can never get back is time. The moments you share with the people you love is what means the most. Life can go by quickly and it’s easy to get caught up in school, work, and other activities, forgetting to take a moment to appreciate the ones who are there for us. Whether it’s laughing together, opening up about hardships, or even just sitting in silence together, these small memories can be some of our happiest ones. Looking back, I wish I had spent more time with the people I love, and cherished each opportunity before it was too late.
In 2022, my grandfather’s health quickly started to decline. Over the next year it continued to get worse. Throughout this time, we started going to his house every weekend we could. This was challenging though; we had our own life and places to go, but visiting my grandpa every weekend became a routine. Sure we didn’t want to go sometimes, not because we didn’t want to see him, but because we hadn’t been home for a weekend in ages. Looking back at it now, I am glad we went to see him so often because soon after the visits came to an end.
I remember it like it was yesterday. My grandfather had visited my uncle in the summer of 2022 and started to not feel well as soon as he came back. Over the next couple months my mom took him to multiple doctors visits and found out he had liver cancer, lung cancer, and was in kidney failure. This is where it all started to go downhill. As a result of finding out this heartbreaking news, that winter my grandfather had to start dialysis treatment. This was very hard on him for many reasons; the strain it put on his body as well as quitting drinking cold turkey. As great as the man my grandfather was, he had struggled with alcohol problems for most of his life. From this day on until the day he passed I’m proud to say he did not have a sip of alcohol as someone who was drinking consistently for over 50 years.
A few more months went by and my grandfather’s health was declining faster even with the treatments. May arrived and it was one of the lowest points in my life that I’ve had to deal with. Seeing my grandfather how he was, was so heartbreaking. He had lost so much weight he was almost unrecognizable. He didn’t want his grandkids to see him like this, but I am glad my parents made us visit him anyway even though it was hard on us too. No matter how difficult it is to see someone you love slowly dying, the time you spend together is so precious.
May 18th, 2023. To paint the scene, I was babysitting my brothers and my dad had just gotten home with my sister. She was coming home from college for the summer. My mom had left work early because my grandfather wasn’t picking up his phone and she had a bad feeling. She had taken him to the hospital and from there an ambulance had brought him to another hospital. From this day on I would rarely see my mom. She practically lived with my grandfather now tending to his every need because he had become so ill he couldn’t take care of his basic needs. This was the most ill he had ever been. Unfortunately my mom’s gut feeling was right. May 27th 2023, my grandfather passed away.
The last day I got to spend with him was May 21st. As unfortunate as the events were, it was a great last memory for me. We got his favorite ice cream from Friendly’s called Fribble and it was my first time having it. I remember us all talking in the living room and my grandpa told us that he had known the singer MeatLoaf before he was MeatLoaf. If that wasn’t crazy enough he had also told us that he dated Jennifer Beals, one of the lead actors in the movie Flashdance.
As this was one of the hardest things I’ve had to deal with in my life, I am thankful I got to spend all this time with my grandpa. He made so many memories with us and would do anything for any of his grandchildren no matter the circumstances. He didn’t have a favorite, he loved us all equally. I will forever be grateful for all the moments at the lake house, Easter, Christmases, and all of the fishing trips we took. If I could do it all over again I would take every chance I could to spend time with my grandpa because time is the one thing you can never get back.