I’ve always had a problem with cutting loose ends,

But maybe that’s because I like the way it frays,

And I like the way time shows itself on old yellowed pages,

Because it teaches me that nothing can last forever.

Maybe in kindergarten,

I meant to paint letters on my castle,

Because I knew kings and queens had names

and that every time I walked into MY house,

I saw My name above the doorway.

Back before Velcro turned into shoelaces,

Nap time was more than blue matts,

And quiet whispers,

It was relaxation,

Relaxation we didn’t want or need because the world was beautiful,

And there was too much to explore and too little time to do it.

Back before light up shoes changed to high heels,

And you didn’t worry about dances or first kisses,

Instead, you spent your days wondering if clouds were really made of cotton,

Before the insecurities,

When your biggest concern of the day was whether or not you’d make a NEW friend,

Instead of how to KEEP one.

I don’t, walk with my head high,

I don’t, stand up straight,

Sometimes…I won’t even look you in the eye.

But at what point did my straight path veer to the left,

When I ment it to go right,

And at what point,

Did I learn things,

From frayed string and yellowed pages.

Back before Velcro turned into shoelaces,

And the colors of the wind were rainbows,

Instead of just waters reflection,

Before makeup was cool,

And before my first kiss.

I learned,

That I am NOT a hermit crab,

I will not grow and grow,

Until I am so cramped,

And uncomfortable,

That I have to move and find a new home.

I am content,

Right here,

I am content,

Right where I stand,

And I realized,

That I am just like frayed string,

I am just like those old yellowed pages.

Because time has taken me and has made me grow,

But it’s also torn me apart in directions,

I didn’t even know exsisted,

Because there’s more than left,

Right,

And straight ahead.

And I’ve made my choice,

I will embrace my yellowed pages,

My insecurities,

I will embrace my frayed strings,

And know that I am beautifully broken.

I will take all that I have and more,

Just to walk this world,

All that I have and more,

To experience what it was that I missed before,

Before shoelaces,

And before makeup,

And  I know I won’t always cross my t’s and dot my i’s,

But time will accept me anyways.